Vodkatrain

Some facts for you:

• It is the longest train route in the world

• It is about 9000km

• It takes about 7 days and 7 nights on a train from Moscow to Beijing

• It may be called the vodkatrain but there is definately more train than vodka involved.

So considering all those facts above as you can imagine it was one hell of a long journey. Luckily, we had a big group to keep us entertained, which consisted of two groups of 12. In our group we had Moomz and me, Ben and Laura (Brummies), Craig and John (our cabin roomies), Ellie (Liverpool way), Ger and Trina (Danish girls), Marlin and Carolin (Swedish girls), and finally Emma (Norwegian). The other group was made up of our Gozilla roomies in Moscow, Clint, Alisa, Matt, James, Rachael and Dave, aswell as 3 ozzies, Craig, James, and Monique, Andrew Hunter (Cambridge), and a couple Andrew and Helen from London way. Even though we were split into two groups most of the time we were together and it was always good to have some fresh people to talk too.

The first day we meet our honcho in the morning who too be honest didn't have a clue, and made us trek in around Moscow and on the tube with our bags which were too heavy to put on our backs and pushed down my trousers when walking. So I wasn't only in pain I was flashing most of Moscow's locals and sweating all over the place. Eventually we reached the train station and jumped aboard. Obv heading to the 3rd class section which was full of Russians. Our cabins can't really be called a cabin as it had no door and was basically like sleeping on a bed in a corridor. Mares took the top I took the bottom, and that was where we stayed for the next 4 nights. From then on our days revolved around sleeping, eating pot noodles, playing cards (Mares is crap at all games), looking out the window at shacks and trees and keeping Mares well supplied with Snickers. Personally I felt Mares and I were a ray of sunshine on the train, when people felt down and wanted to sleep we kept them entertained (James especially appreciate this).

I know I probably havn't painted the best picture of the journey but it really was amazing, even without having a shower for that long. Thank god for babywipes!! In particular we made friends with two Russian lads, Dima and Sasha who wanted to learn English. Well considering I'm going to be a teacher I had no idea what they were going on about, simple, progressive and perfect. Once they realise that we clearly weren't the people for the job we started playing cards instead. Once again Mares couldn't grasp the concept of many card games.

Taking pictures of trees was a vital part of the trans-siberian experience and as an opportunity would arise you had to make the most of it, so we all ran over to the window to take a picture, when we heard a grumble from the bed where Mares had sat on a little chinese lady. The social butterfly that Mares is probably thought that making friend with two Russians wasn't enough and that we should probably expand our worldly horizons.

It was also nice to get fresh air at every station we stopped at and have a stretch/ the lunge was our new best friend.

Finally after 4 days we were free. It was an early start but our honchos met us at the station. They were called Kostya and Lena. We had a mini look around Irkutsk before going to Lake Bikal. We got to the chalets and the showers were in sight. Everyone got given their rooms, with Me, Mares and Matt left to the end....and then thet ran out so we had to walk down a huge hill past a herd of cows to our delapadated shack of accommodation. This was going to be the party pad for sure. On the up side we were clean, long johns on (looking sexy I must admitt) and ready to go.

We headed to have a look at the lake, which was massive. Some of the group went to look around a musuem which didn't appeal so Me, Mares, Ben and Laura (the 4 brummies) and Ozzie Craig headed up to a view point. We decided to adopt Ozzie Craig into our brummie crew and taught him key points to acting and talking like you are from Birmingham, 'ennit!'.

Later it was sauna time. It was so funny we had to get naked and put a towel around us with the others who decided to have ago at it, then taking it in turns we went into the hottest room and got beaten with tree leaves and saw many a side boob. Mares gave me a few cheeky shanks, but she couldn't hack the heat for too long. As she walked out the door the steam covered the room, it began to clear, at at that moment their eyes meet. We all knew that Kostya was the right man for the job, the man who could tame Mary and become her Russian husband. With the GBH over with, we had a feast of a dinner (anything beats noodles) and got the vodka/sambuca out. Mares made her moved and asked Kostya to be her hubby, it was a quick wedding which was confirmed with vodka shots. I approved of the marriage as Kostya carried both mine and Mares bags to and from the station up about 100 steps.

The next day we went on a boat, most people felt sick. So heres another lesson, don't drink vodka and think it will be ok to go sailing. We also had another look around Irkutsk and grabbed some grub before getting back on the train. But to our suprise we had moved to 2nd class and it was well pukka. All 24 of us were in the same carriage. Once again the next 2 nights consisted of eating noodles, and Mares, Craig and I dancing up and down the train singing the locomotion. TUNE ! And a ridiculously long border crossing, who would honestly want to sneak into Mongolia. Thought I was going to wet myself, and after 8 hours I very nearly did.

Yet again another early start and the next stop off was Ulaanbaator in Mongolia, we jumped into the mini bus and headed out the city into the country side to stay at a ger camp. It was really kool, mountains and little ger houses where the nomadic Mongolians still lived. We went horse riding, I got a lazy horse. He perked up a little on the way home where Me, Mares and Craig ran off into the sunset, Mares horse going the wrong way and mine stopping half way up a great big hill. We did some archery, climbed a mountain, ate loadsa good food. We were staying in like big tents with wooden beds inside and a fire in the middle. The next day we went to stay in Ulaanbaator, me and Mares somehow landed ourselves with a deluxe suite. Get in !! We went the the museum, where our honcho told us a Mongolian warrior shot a bow over 500miles, we asked him if he meant meters and looked at us if were stupid. Clearly he was, because straight after he told us that mankind desends from Mongolia, not Africa ?? In the evening, we went to a cultural show for dancing, music etc which was really good, and to a Mongolian BBQ. You picked out all the food you wanted and they cooked it on a big heat plate.

...........and then back on the train for one more night, another long border crossing and more noodles untill we finally reached CHINA!!!

xxx